Paul George, 33, who owns a fish-and-chips take-away in Liverpool, was shown the door after he smuggled in that very meal during a posh exhibition opening at the South Banks Arts Centre. He was found cross-legged on the floor under a table.
“I haven't had a decent fish-and-chips since I left Liverpool," George said. "Blimey, it got their knickers in a twist. What a bunch of ol' fuddy-duddies.”
The next day, contestants were put through their paces during a “Royal Rally” at various locations throughout London.
Penelope Pringle, 64, a curator at the Royal Albert Museum in Exeter, wowed judges with her perfectly proper royal wave - moving her wrist ever so slightly back and forth as she passed the judging table.
“I’ve seen her majesty on TV so many times, waving so regally - so I just tried to copy her,” Pringle said, waving proudly. “It must have worked!”
Judges were equally impressed with 70-year-old George Tompkins’ composure during High Tea at The Ritz - which was anything but typical. Hot sauce had been added to the tea and cayenne pepper laced the scones. As for the crumpets – they contained not raisins, but edible bugs.
“That type of thing worked so well across the pond in ‘Fear Factor’ that we had to try it,” said Hyacinth Marple-Holmes, the programme’s executive producer.
Pringle gasped for air after swallowing quite a lot of the spicy tea.
"What the bloomin' 'ell is in that tea?" she shouted, grabbing for a nearby pitcher of water. Her face turned a bright scarlet and she burst into tears as soon as she realized what she had said.
"Oh well," she said later. "We've got a lovely collection of slippers coming into the museum next week. That will keep me busy."
Tompkins seemed not to have noticed anything was amiss.“Years of workin’ the mines deadened ‘me sense o’ smell,” he said. “I thought everything tasted grand. Do you think they’d mind if I took home some crumpets?”
Sally Curtiss, a 22-year-old pre-school teacher from Hampshire, was done in by flowers presented to her during a walk-about near St. Paul’s Cathedral.
“Bloody flowers!” she said between sniffles and sneezes, frantically grabbing for a handkerchief. “I have terrible hayfever! Bloody hell – how will I ever meet Prince Harry now?”
Producers have said repeatedly that contestants are judged by how well they maintain their composure at all times.
“Royals do not sniffle public,” said Marple-Holmes. “And for heaven’s sake they never blow their nose. That’s simply not done when you wear a crown.”
1 comment:
Good for people to know.
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